Not a Hero Read online

  “No. I bought everything myself. No one knows—or they didn’t—where I’m hiding.”

  His brows drew together. “Not even the FBI?”

  “Spyros has informants in both the police and FBI on his payroll. I figured entrusting myself to them would get me killed. So I ran.” The memory of that time sent a tremor of dismay through her…because she’d have to run again.

  “You ran.” Eyes narrowed, he looked out of the wide windows for a moment. “How did you learn Baumer had asked the Chicago PD about you?”

  “An FBI special agent. He’s my only contact, and he keeps me updated about the investigation. He’s been wonderful. He didn’t like that I ran, didn’t know where I went, but he understood my reason.”

  “Understood? Even though you didn’t let him know where you were?” Gabe’s eyebrows went up.

  “I didn’t want him put in a bad position if his higher-ups asked him where I was.” She sighed. “That’s why I didn’t tell you, either.”

  * * *

  Jesus. Gabe studied Julie.

  As she stared down at their entwined fingers, her long eyelashes were a shade darker than her golden hair, making shadows on her pale cheeks. Her hand trembled in his.

  She was scared—and with good reason.

  In the time between Baumer’s revelation and Julie’s appearance in the office, Gabe had been busy. He’d called an old SEAL buddy who worked for Interpol. The agent said the quiet librarian had not only defended herself, but the fight had cost the hitman an eye. The few times Spyros had been spotted afterward, he’d worn an eye patch. Interpol was positive the assassin would seek revenge.

  Gabe’s jaw clenched. His buddy had also said Spyros’s sources were reputed to be excellent. If Spyros had an informant in the Chicago PD, the hitman might already know Julie’s location.

  “I talked with a friend in Interpol,” Gabe said. “He said they’ll watch for Spyros entering Alaska, but he’s gotten past them before.”

  “So I’ve heard.” She still hadn’t lifted her gaze, so he put a finger under her chin. The fear he’d seen in her eyes when they met had returned.

  Fuck, he wanted to kill this Spyros.

  And he wanted to assure Julie she was safe here in Rescue. But she wasn’t a woman who’d appreciate lies.

  He ran his knuckles down her cheek. “Whenever I see a movie hero promise a woman she’ll be safe, it pisses me off. No one, no matter how skilled, can guarantee safety. But, Julie, I’ll do everything I can to make sure you are.”

  “Instead, can you help me get out of here without anyone knowing where I went?”

  He could.

  “Are you sure that’s what you want?” An ache grew inside him. She wouldn’t have asked without weighing all her options. Yes, she’d be leaving, and he couldn’t tell her it was a bad decision.

  She nodded.

  “Yes, I’ll help, Julie.”

  Her lips curved slightly. “It’s Audrey—as you know. I’d like it if you used it.”

  “Audrey.” He bent his head and kissed her gently. The sigh she gave held the same sadness he felt. When her arms curled around his neck, he knew he wasn’t the only one feeling as if life had screwed up something that might have been very good.

  Well, he’d give her the traditional warrior’s sendoff, even if it was the female who’d be going into battle.

  Then, he’d declare open season on hitmen and do some hunting himself.

  Rising, he scooped her into his arms, took her up the stairs, and laid her on his bed.

  She sat up to look around.

  He followed her gaze, trying to see his room with a woman’s eyes. Smoothed to a glossy finish, the headboard, footboard, and nightstands were rough-hewn, heavy lumber. The exposed wood ceiling beams and walls were stained a light golden color. Beige shag rugs beside the bed greeted bare feet on cold mornings. The hand quilted spread was a colorful jumble of dark red, white, and cream.

  He’d deliberately kept the room’s colors lighter than downstairs. Getting out of bed was difficult enough during the black Alaskan winters; a cavelike room would make it worse.

  Although waking up beside Audrey would brighten any man’s day.

  She looked good sitting right there.

  “Goldilocks, I’d say you found a bed that fits you just right.”

  “I did.” She patted the quilt, and her voice had turned husky. Excited. “Are you planning what they call goodbye sex?”

  Yeah, she was feeling what he was. “Only if you don’t come back.” She’d damned well better come back.

  Her smile appeared even as tears filled her eyes.

  Without saying more, he stripped her—T-shirt, bra, socks, jeans, and practical boy-cut briefs. Nice.

  He straightened. “It’s your turn to undress me, lazy one.”

  “Oh. Okay.” As she slid off the bed and started on his clothing, her breasts wobbled in a compelling fashion.

  While she removed his shirt, he played with her breasts, cupping, fondling, teasing, then teased her nipples to rigid peaks.

  Her breathing changed. Deepened.

  Pushing him back a step, she fumbled with his jeans buttons. Released, his erection sprang out, and she wrapped her hands around it.

  All right—that would be a good diversion for them both. So he simply enjoyed the moment as she knelt in front of him.

  She was adorably awkward, enough that he could tell she hadn’t often given blowjobs. But her tongue was hot and wet, and she was careful with her teeth, something a man could appreciate. When she closed her mouth around him and started bobbing her head, heat swept through him, and his dick swelled with the urge to get off right then.

  A wise man didn’t let his cock rule the roost.

  Gabe tangled his fingers in her hair, firmly slowing her, and letting himself savor the slow slide of her mouth, the flickers of her slick tongue, the sheer heat. Yeah, he loved how she threw herself into pleasing him.

  Before he reached the point of no return, he gently pulled back, scooped her up, and laid her on his bed.

  He hadn’t closed the wooden pocket doors, and light streamed in from the lakeside windows. As he looked down at her, her cheeks flushed. She instinctively started to cover herself.

  “Uh-uh, sweetheart.” He caught her hands and curled her fingers around the thick vertical headboard pieces.

  She blushed darker. Fuck, he liked that color in her cheeks. So, knowing it would fluster her, he said softly, “Open your legs for me.”

  Her protest died under his stern look. His cop look. In the academy, no one had mentioned all the potential uses.

  He sat beside her, cupping a pretty breast to fondle as her legs slid apart…slowly. A snail would have moved faster, but he was in no hurry. Under his touch, her nipples were bunching tighter.

  Bending, he kissed her, teasing her breasts as he did. Then he moved his palm down her stomach, enjoying the feel of the silken skin. A glance showed him that she’d stopped opening her legs way too soon. So he stroked over her mound, never lower, feeling the quivers as her need grew.

  “Gabe…”

  She put her arms around his shoulders as he kissed her.

  “Hands up here, sweetheart.” He put her hands back on the headboard, trying not to smile as she whimpered.

  “You’re a controlling, bossy…person,” she muttered, obviously having thought better of the nastier word like bastard or asshole.

  “Yes, I am.” And wasn’t it nice that she enjoyed that side of his nature. “Why? Did you want to be in charge?”

  Her mouth dropped open. “Uh…no.”

  He hadn’t thought so.

  He dipped his fingers to graze the top of her swollen clit. “If you want more, your legs need to be wider apart.”

  Her low whine made him harder than a rock. Her legs spread.

  “Very nice.” Rising, he stripped off his jeans. From his nightstand drawer, he popped a mint lozenge in his mouth. Just for fun.

  The quilt w
as cool under his knees as he settled between her legs and took a long appreciative look. “Damn, you’re beautiful.”

  The surprise, then delight in her face hurt his heart. If she didn’t disappear out of his life, he’d do his damndest to tell her often.

  Because everything about her was lovely. Tiny freckles dotted the top of her breasts, shoulders, and arms. Her upper arms and shoulders had firmed up from carrying bar trays. Her high breasts had pink nipples that were peaked and rosy from his fondling. Her waist curved in then out to lush hips. He really liked the sweet roundness of her tummy.

  The golden curls covering her pussy were damp with her arousal—and yeah, he wanted a taste before they got down to serious fucking.

  She moved a hand from the headboard. “I want to touch you, too.” Her gray eyes were stormy with the appeal.

  Perhaps she wasn’t comfortable with receiving and not giving? Yes, that would be like her. “All right. But hands and tongue only. No mouth.”

  Because he wanted this to last a lot longer than if that talented mouth started teasing his dick.

  “Um…got it.”

  “Turn over onto your side.”

  When she was arranged on her right side, he lay down, facing her in a sixty-nine position, moving until his face was at her pussy, and her face was near his groin. He blew a puff of air and felt her shiver. Yeah, this would be fun...

  When her warm fingers stroked down his shaft, he almost groaned. Fun and a pure test of his control.

  So that he could use his hands, he positioned her left leg over him, knee pointing toward the ceiling, and her foot flat on the bed behind his head. Nice and open.

  Resting his head on her soft inner thigh, he licked over her clit.

  Her thigh muscles tensed, bouncing his head, and making him grin.

  Her hot tongue ran over his erection, making it jump in turn, and she wiggled nearer. When her mouth closed around him, he almost laughed.

  He might have known she wouldn’t obey. Stubborn librarian. Well, it’d be his job to see she was panting too hard to suck cock.

  * * *

  Audrey rested her head on Gabe’s left thigh and tried to keep her attention on fondling and licking over his velvet-skinned shaft.

  But his fingers, his lips…

  Oh my God, she kept losing track of what she wanted to do to him. As he teased her clit, his tongue was so very hot, and yet…each lick left a strange cold sensation behind. When he blew over the sensitive nub, his breath felt icy. The combination of warm and cold on her most intimate area was overwhelming.

  A second later, he’d engulfed the area in the heat of his mouth.

  Even as she moaned, he penetrated her with two fingers, pumping gently.

  The incredible sensations drove every thought out of her mind.

  Low in her belly, muscles tightened as her insides clasped his fingers. Each long lick of his hot tongue increased the lust pulsing in her blood stream.

  She tried to remember to stroke him, to suck him, and then his tongue would stroke over her with unerring precision.

  She tried to pull her hips back so she could keep control and do her part, but he put an unyielding hand behind her butt, drawing her closer instead. His fingers plunged faster, deeper.

  A moan broke from her as the ruthless hold sent shudders through her while the pressure grew.

  His tongue circled her sensitive nub, even as he squeezed her buttocks and slid a finger down the crease.

  The fireball of an orgasm burned from the inside out, shooting her higher and higher, and still, he didn’t release her. His tongue kept moving lightly, ceaselessly wringing out the last flickers of pleasure.

  A light kiss to her pussy made her spasm again before he sat up, pulling his rigid shaft from her limp fingers.

  “I…I forgot. You didn’t get—”

  His eyes glinted with amusement. “That was the idea.” After covering himself with a condom from the nightstand, he rolled her to her back and lowered himself on top of her.

  She wrapped her arms around his broad shoulders. The feeling of his weight on her, pressing her into the mattress, fogged her brain and electrified her blood.

  With a hand, he positioned the thick head of his shaft, and she held her breath at the sizzling thrill.

  Then he thrust, surging inside so hard and fast they both gasped for air.

  “Mmm. Right here is where I wanted to be.” Seated deep inside her, he propped himself up on his elbows, moving his hands to bracket her face.

  And he trapped her gaze as he started to move.

  Oh, such a feeling, the heavy, thick shaft filled her completely. As her pussy throbbed around him, her eyes closed at the overwhelming sensation.

  “Mmm, look at me, sweetheart,” he whispered. “I want to see your eyes.”

  His eyes were a bottomless blue, burning into her. He took her with merciless, driving thrusts, possessing her, soul and body.

  He slid a hand under her bottom to raise her hips for still greater penetration as his body turned rigid, the cords on his neck standing out as he came.

  His body shuddered as he pulled in a long, slow breath.

  Setting his forehead against hers, he huffed a laugh. His lips were gentle as he kissed her lightly. “I had planned to get you off again, but you’re a bit too clever with those fingers of yours. You won’t be getting a 69 very often.”

  No, she wouldn’t. Never again.

  An ache set up residence in her heart at the thought of losing him. Of never making love with him again. Never seeing him after tomorrow.

  Nonetheless, she had no choice. To save her own life, she needed to get far away from here.

  Even more important, she needed to be far away from Gabe. Because the thought of dying was far, far less terrifying than the thought of this man getting hurt or killed while protecting her from Spyros.

  Chapter Twenty

  The next morning, Audrey got out of Gabe’s Jeep, and he walked her to the coffee shop.

  Although it was Tuesday and he had to work, he’d volunteered to drive her to Anchorage. She’d told him she’d wait until he got off work.

  He thought the coffee shop was safe, since it was unlikely Spyros and his crew had already reached Rescue. Just in case, Gabe wanted her in a very public space. Spyros would want his revenge up close and personal.

  Meantime, since she had a safe internet spot here, she’d order a new ID, figure out where to hide out in Anchorage, and where to get a new car.

  Once in the city, she could hide until her ID came. After that, maybe she’d return to the Lower 48 or move to a village in the interior.

  As Gabe held open the coffee shop door for her, she looked up at his chiseled face, and blinked back tears. When had the deadly police chief become so dear to her?

  And why did he have to be so amazing, in and out of bed?

  Sex with him was…well, like all those romance books made it sound. But what had truly turned her to mush was when he’d pulled her into his big enclosed shower and washed her. Washed her hair.

  How could such powerful hands be so gentle?

  When she’d protested, he’d laughed and said, “Then you can wash me, Goldilocks, since you think you didn’t get to play with my dick enough in bed.”

  Oh, what had followed had been amazing. Because when she’d washed his shaft, it lengthened. Thickened. After stepping out to grab a condom from the counter drawer, he bent her over the long tile bench and took her, fast and hard, using his fingers on her to ensure she came when he did.

  Her legs had been so weak afterward he had to help her out of the shower.

  And this wasn’t what she should be thinking about right now. Way to go, girl. Now her lower half was tingling and needy, wanting to drag Gabe home for more.

  Instead, she straightened her shoulders and stepped into the coffee shop.

  He followed her in and ran a palm down her hair. “You sure you want to leave?” he asked softly.

  She nodded. �
�It’ll be safer.” For me and for everyone around me.

  But, God, it hurt.

  As she stood there, he wrapped his arms around her in an all-encompassing hug. And her heart simply melted into a warm puddle.

  They hadn’t known each other that long, yet…she was totally in love with him.

  She was leaving. Leaving him. The fog-filled morning air held a chill that matched the one in Gabe’s gut.

  After giving Uriah and Sarah a heads-up that Audrey might have someone bad looking for her, Gabe stalked through Rescue, nodding at the few people who greeted him. The rest scurried from his path. He was scaring the locals…and he didn’t particularly care.

  She was leaving.

  He hadn’t wanted to get involved with her—or anyone—but he sure had. Hell of a mistake.

  Only he couldn’t call the time he’d spent with her a mistake. More like a gift.

  Still…she was leaving. His jaw clenched. He’d really like to hit something.

  That wasn’t like him at all.

  “Chief’s sure in a pissed-off mood,” he heard a couple of women say. “Best stay out of his way.”

  That brought him up short. For fuck’s sake, he was supposed to be the good guy here. With a sigh, he scrubbed his hands over his face. Get a grip, MacNair. You have people to protect, and it shouldn’t be from yourself.

  Pulling in a slow breath through his nose, he stowed his feelings away, a technique he’d mastered early in his SEAL career. Allowing emotions in battle got people killed. He’d think about Audrey when he wasn’t on duty. Later.

  As his balance settled, he nodded to the women. “Sorry, ladies. I don’t think I got my full gallon of coffee.”

  They gave him smiles and “good mornings” and resumed their stroll down the sidewalk.

  There. He gave himself two points for good community relations and continued.

  He’d still rather beat the crap out of someone.

  The day passed slowly. Knowing Audrey was in the coffee shop was a unique form of torture. She was safe there, far safer than if she was holed up in a lonely cabin or even trying to hide in Anchorage. But still…